You might be familiar with the 1983 movie A Christmas Story, which is about a young boy named Ralphie who tries to convince his parents, his teacher, and Santa that a Red Ryder BB gun is the perfect Christmas gift. The story is based on the semi-autobiographical writings of American humorist Jean Shepherd, who also narrated the movie.
I had never heard of Jean Shepherd before I had a brief but amusing exchange with him on the phone. It happened when I was about 14, and my neighbor Paul and I were listening to Portland's KBOO Radio, which at the time was having a pledge drive featuring Shepherd as its celebrity co-host. Shepherd was inviting listeners to phone in and chat with him, in exchange for pledging money to KBOO. At one point, Shepherd mentioned that he was a private pilot, and my ears perked up. My dad was also a private pilot who, with four friends, co-owned and flew a 1947 Funk airplane.
I decided to call, against all odds of getting through due to the undoubtedly high volume of calls. I seriously was not expecting to actually get to speak with the famous Jean Shepherd, whoever he was.
Miraculously, I got through on my first try. Shit, what will I say? Before I even had a chance to come up with something, anything, I heard Shepherd's voice booming through the receiver.
Shepherd: Hello, KBOO; Jean Shepherd here. What would you like to talk about?
Me: Um...uh...um...I...I understand you're a pilot.
Shepherd: Yes, I am.
Me: My dad's a pilot, too. He flies a 1947 Funk.
Shepherd: I once dated a funk!
I laughed, Shepherd laughed, he thanked me for calling, and that was it. Years later, when I saw A Christmas Story and realized whom I had spoken with, I felt both proud and embarrassed: Proud that I had actually spoken on the phone with Shepherd, but embarrassed by my inane choice of topics. Kudos to Shepherd, though, for not only managing to avoid shaming me, but for making me feel like I was his sidekick, setting him up for a joke.
And that's my little "Christmas Story."
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